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So many wonderfully insightful posts here. I can't say it any better. But first I do want to say how sorry I am for your loss. I know the pain all too well, as I've lost many dogs over the years. And it's heart wrenching every time. Just last February I lost my little Chihuahua who had been with me almost 14 years. She was the dearest little thing. I already had gotten the two toy Poodles not too long before I had to say good bye to her. So, I didn't really have to wait for another dog.

But I have lost dogs in the past where I had no other dog. I really couldn't wait very long for another puppy to love. I think when I lost my last GSD, it was only a matter of a couple of months before I got my Lab puppy. I still missed my lovely GSD but was ready to love another.

But it's different for everyone I guess. Some people need quite a bit of time before taking that step of getting another pup. Not me. I neeeeeed a dog in my life and I seem to realize that no dog will be the same as the other dog but that the new dog will have wonderful qualities of it's own. I chose a different breed and sex on purpose so I wouldn't compare so much. But she was a lovely puppy and I adored her. It got my mind of my sadness a little and kept me very busy. Soon, that place in my heart was filled again. I will always miss all the dogs I've lost...before Chulita (Chi) it was my Doberman who I lost at age 4 to cancer. He was my heart dog. That one took a long time to feel better about. And now, mostly, when I look at his photos, I smile. I do not cry.

Well, I'm just rambling my thoughts. I think it's true...that you'll know when you're ready to dive in with a new puppy and share your love and home with a new fur pal. You'll have your memories and photos of your dear Pella to keep beside you too. And I think the pain will turn into thankfulness that you had her in your life and you'll become more accepting all the while your new little love will be there with you too.
 

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Both look nice dogs, but Grace looks an absolute darling!
 
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Like most things, it's different for everyone dealing with the loss of a beloved pet. When we lost our Pomeranian, my heart dog, I didn't think I could/would ever have another dog. My heart was totally broken. I had never loved a dog like that before, and I was devastated. But our house was so empty and lonely without a dog. And as much as I loved the Pomeranian breed, I knew no other Pom could live up it my Cooper. So for me, changing breeds was for the best. And honestly, I was excited to have Lily join our family and give her a wonderful home, but it did take me awhile to bond with her and actually love her (or admit to loving her). Maybe it sounds terrible to say that, but I think I was guarding myself. I still miss my Pom every single day, but Lily is a wonderful loving dog and I am so glad I found her.
I am sorry for your loss and I hope you find another dog to share your love.
 

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First , I'm very sorry for your loss. Most of us here have been through this and know the feeling all to well.

Penny is my third Standard Poodle. First there was Roxy who was just about as perfect a dog as can be. She was there when we had our daughter and she was so wonderful to Rachel. She was there when we had our son Dylan and again she was just wonderful to have in every way. Roxy pasted when the kids were still pretty young and they wanted another Roxy. Within a month or so we got Beau, another black Standard. I wasn't ready but I felt the kids needed to have their grief resolved sooner than I. In time though Beau grew on me and I realized that Roxy passing had nothing to do with Beau (obviously) and he was there to help us all through. But Beau, well, Beau was a bit of a project as it turned out but he to wound up being a wonderful dog. He passed about eighteen months ago and my kids were mostly grown up. Daughter off to college. Son a senior in high school so the need to get a "replacement" didn't seem to urgent. I still miss that old boy. As time went on I started thinking- Do I really want to go through all that puppy stuff and start all over again? I came here to Poodle Forum and introduced myself and the situation and to get advice about the search. It was through this forum that I was encouraged to start the search. And I'm so glad I did. I now have Penny, another black Spoo who is just a hoot. I didn't realize how low I had gotten till she came into our lives. Don't get me wrong, I'm a lucky lucky boy. Great job I love, a wife, who for some reason, adores me and two great kids. But there was something missing, and that was a spunky puppy. Now that the kids are older and Isabelle, my wife, and I are going to be empty nesters in the next year or so I have the time to really appreciate Penny and all the puppy nuttyness that comes with and just look at it as a kind of entertainment that I could get anywhere else.

Your journey is your own so take the time you need to feel right about your decision. But here you are so you already seem like you're headed in the new puppy direction. Keep us posted.

Rick
 

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Thank you Rick, it helps to hear all that. Yes I do think I want a puppy, not a rescue...I have dreams of training my next Poodle to their Canine Good Citizenship, and to being a therapy dog that I can take with me to hospitals and nursing homes. I'm tempted to get a rescue because doing so saves a life, and also, they are all housebroken! Or, at least, some of them are...and older and generally over the puppy stuff. Less work. Also, my terrier may be happiest with another dog roughly his own age, which is 8.

But, much as that would make him happy, and also be less trouble for me, I suspect it would be hard to find a rescue that would be up to the challenge of being a therapy dog and truly SOLID citizen. I would very much welcome stories to the contrary, but the rescues I have been involved with all recovered more than i would have thought given what they went through...but having that rough start is something that never truly left them either.

And size is not totally settled for me either...I very much like having a dog that I can simply pick up if it misbehaves. 15 - 20lbs would be good I think. I do want a dog bigger than Pella was. And maybe I even want a small Standard? I am not wanting to spend months walking a large dog that yanks on the leash, which is what I am going through with Matilda. The icy season is upon us soon and I shudder to think of walking her in that weather! Thank God I own microspikes! I'm just not sure how much of what I want has to do with temperament (not pulling, being highly energetic on the leash) vs. how much is size (because all dogs will be like that sometimes).

Anyhow thank you for putting that into words...that you had a wonderful life but still very much needed your new puppy. I think I might be in the same boat.
 

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I am sorry for your loss. At 72 I have lost a number of dogs, all poodles or "probably Poodles" Standards, Minis and Toys. Each one brought love and richness into my life and heartache and loss when they left. So far I have been lucky enough to have had 2 dogs of a lifetime, and many wonderful friends- and each one is different. Do not be put off by your irritation with your teenager's antics , That doesnt mean you aren't ready, that means that she is a teenager, and is being irritating and you are a human and somedays it gets to you. I think you have done a wonderful thing in fostering- But she will leave and you will still have a dog shaped hole in your life. I would start looking for a puppy with a nice attitude now, and while Spoos are my first love, i would suggest that you look for a Mini from sensible lines so as to not have a big difference in size between your dogs. As your boy gets older and a little stiffer a smaller housemate might be easier to live with. My big girls were always pretty kind to the smaller ones, but sometimes knocked then over by accident.Your boy may be a huge help in training the new one. One time I got up to 5 , and some were small rescues who were clueless about "Potty time" I would yell "Potty Time" and my little male would round everyone up for a mad dash to the dog door to the run and it didnt take long before that was a favored activity!
Time goes by really fast, You will never stop missing her, but there really is room for one more in your heart( and another, and another) There is an old song that says" If you can't be with the one you love, love the one your with" and with dogs that is pretty good advice.
 

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Grief is so personal and isolating that I think hearing other's share their stories is a healthy way to cope; to feel less alone and like you have a connection to someone. I can't tell you what is right for you, but I can share my experience of what was right for me.

Before my husband and I were married, we moved back to his home town and bought a house. His dad had been diagnosed with cancer and bought himself the dog he always wanted. A black standard poodle named Barney whom he refused to neuter. For a year or two, he kept his dog, took him hunting and then when he was too ill, they stayed home. At the time my father in law began hospice care, my mother in law had also moved in her own aging mother who had multiple heart "episodes" every week. That house was a place of chaos and stress, and it's no wonder poor Barney took to piddling on the floor if you looked at him.

My father in law and grandmother in law each passed within 6 months of each other. Shortly after, my mother in law sold her house and moved away to a condo. We adopted Barney Balls, as we'd come to call him. (They were just SO prominent!) My mother in law paid for all his vet care and grooming. She paid to have him kenneled when we all traveled to Jamaica for my wedding. She often bought him food and treats. In a very short time, the piddling stopped and Barney enjoyed leaping through our fenced yard like a deer and lounging on his very own loveseat (a leftover from my hubby's college dorm days). Our only responsibility to him was daily love and care. Then I got pregnant and gave birth to our one and only. A very colicky boy. Barney kept his distance and just watched. He never barked at anything.

He was with us for a couple years or so. By then he was 4, I think. And then one day, I let him back in from playing in the yard and he wasn't himself. Wouldn't eat or drink. Had a strange cough and was lethargic. It didn't get better and we called my mother in law. Together she and I took our beloved Barney Balls to the emergency Sunday vet in the next town. Bloat. Barney suffered from bloat. We were clueless and didn't recognize the signs. We had no idea such a thing even happened. Surgery was an expensive option. One my mother in law was willing to cover, but he had suffered so long before being seen that there was considerable organ damage, and his quality of life would be compromised. We let him go, but I couldn't bear to stay. I sat outside on the curb and my mother in law sat with him.

We adored that dog, and all the weight of the decisions I'd made leading up to that tragedy were heavy and full of guilt. We focused on raising our son and while from time to time we wanted to add a dog, we weren't interested in the responsibility. "Maybe when our son's in Kindergarten," I would say. That year came and went. Naturally, our boy is an animal fan. Whatever the creature, he's interested, but dogs most of all. We go to friends houses and he plays with their pets, not their kids. He begged for years to have a dog, but always the answer was no. I'm the one home all day. I would be the primary caretaker. I wasn't ready for that.

My son is a 4th grader now, and somehow I came to change my mind. Came to feel like I could welcome an always-loyal and trusting dog to my life. Felt confident I could make good choices for it's health. We thought about another breed for a little while, even pug-sat a weekend for some acquaintances and I nearly changed my mind back to the negative! Pugs are not the dogs for us. I found a spoo breeder in my home state and put a deposit on a puppy. Sadly, that puppy, and much of his litter, were born ill and didn't survive. Crushed before we'd even gotten a dog, we decided to stick it out and wait for another litter. The breeder felt terrible, and helped connect us to another pup in need of a home. He was 10 weeks old, ready right now and a 4 hour drive.

Wrex came home to us over Labor Day weekend this year. He's now 5 months old. My first puppy to teach and train. My first grown up pet for whom I'm financially responsible. The first month was hard. I was angry at this innocent dog for no reason. He wasn't Barney. That's what it was. Even 9 years later, I felt expectations. Wrex looks nothing like him and he certainly doesn't behave like him. Wrex is his own...person, so to speak...and I was expecting him to live up to the memory of my first canine love. Not fair to him. Unhealthy of me. Waiting a long time was the right thing for me and my husband. I know he struggles with the "not Barney" feelings too. We are getting used to each other. Taking him to play with other dogs and seeing just how wonderfully behaved his is by comparison has helped. Do I love him to pieces yet? No, I have to admit. I'm slow to warm. But he amuses me these days. I don't resent him like I did in the beginning. I know we will become good friends who enjoy each other in time.

I wish for you nothing but a peaceful heart. I hope you continue to find comfort here on the poodle boards.
 

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Do not be put off by your irritation with your teenager's antics , That doesnt mean you aren't ready, that means that she is a teenager, and is being irritating and you are a human and somedays it gets to you. I think you have done a wonderful thing in fostering- But she will leave and you will still have a dog shaped hole in your life. I would start looking for a puppy with a nice attitude now, and while Spoos are my first love, i would suggest that you look for a Mini from sensible lines so as to not have a big difference in size between your dogs. As your boy gets older and a little stiffer a smaller housemate might be easier to live with.
Time goes by really fast, You will never stop missing her, but there really is room for one more in your heart( and another, and another) There is an old song that says" If you can't be with the one you love, love the one your with" and with dogs that is pretty good advice.

Thank you Rohan for those soothing words of advice. It helps to hear that it's only human to be frustrated with the teenager sometimes. And a "dog shaped hole". Yes...that describes it pretty accurately.

Hearing your opinion on size helps solidify my leaning towards another smaller dog. And I think you're right that there is room in my heart for another right now. I may follow up on getting more info on Sadie...she would be the right size for my terrier poodle mix, and a good age too. With her temperament just maybe she would be up for the job of being a therapy dog as well...
 

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Grief is so personal and isolating that I think hearing other's share their stories is a healthy way to cope; to feel less alone and like you have a connection to someone.

We thought about another breed for a little while, even pug-sat a weekend for some acquaintances and I nearly changed my mind back to the negative! Pugs are not the dogs for us. I found a spoo breeder in my home state and put a deposit on a puppy.

The first month was hard. I was angry at this innocent dog for no reason. He wasn't Barney. That's what it was. Even 9 years later, I felt expectations.

I wish for you nothing but a peaceful heart. I hope you continue to find comfort here on the poodle boards.
cmarrie, that is a hard story to share. I have to admit that I don't really know the signs of bloat either. What a difficult thing to go through. You illustrate so poignantly that I am not alone in feeling keenly the loss of my Poodle friend.

Thank you for sharing your story. It does indeed ease the isolation to hear other people's stories.
 

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Grief is so personal and isolating that I think hearing other's share their stories is a healthy way to cope; to feel less alone and like you have a connection to someone. I can't tell you what is right for you, but I can share my experience of what was right for me.



Before my husband and I were married, we moved back to his home town and bought a house. His dad had been diagnosed with cancer and bought himself the dog he always wanted. A black standard poodle named Barney whom he refused to neuter. For a year or two, he kept his dog, took him hunting and then when he was too ill, they stayed home. At the time my father in law began hospice care, my mother in law had also moved in her own aging mother who had multiple heart "episodes" every week. That house was a place of chaos and stress, and it's no wonder poor Barney took to piddling on the floor if you looked at him.



My father in law and grandmother in law each passed within 6 months of each other. Shortly after, my mother in law sold her house and moved away to a condo. We adopted Barney Balls, as we'd come to call him. (They were just SO prominent!) My mother in law paid for all his vet care and grooming. She paid to have him kenneled when we all traveled to Jamaica for my wedding. She often bought him food and treats. In a very short time, the piddling stopped and Barney enjoyed leaping through our fenced yard like a deer and lounging on his very own loveseat (a leftover from my hubby's college dorm days). Our only responsibility to him was daily love and care. Then I got pregnant and gave birth to our one and only. A very colicky boy. Barney kept his distance and just watched. He never barked at anything.



He was with us for a couple years or so. By then he was 4, I think. And then one day, I let him back in from playing in the yard and he wasn't himself. Wouldn't eat or drink. Had a strange cough and was lethargic. It didn't get better and we called my mother in law. Together she and I took our beloved Barney Balls to the emergency Sunday vet in the next town. Bloat. Barney suffered from bloat. We were clueless and didn't recognize the signs. We had no idea such a thing even happened. Surgery was an expensive option. One my mother in law was willing to cover, but he had suffered so long before being seen that there was considerable organ damage, and his quality of life would be compromised. We let him go, but I couldn't bear to stay. I sat outside on the curb and my mother in law sat with him.



We adored that dog, and all the weight of the decisions I'd made leading up to that tragedy were heavy and full of guilt. We focused on raising our son and while from time to time we wanted to add a dog, we weren't interested in the responsibility. "Maybe when our son's in Kindergarten," I would say. That year came and went. Naturally, our boy is an animal fan. Whatever the creature, he's interested, but dogs most of all. We go to friends houses and he plays with their pets, not their kids. He begged for years to have a dog, but always the answer was no. I'm the one home all day. I would be the primary caretaker. I wasn't ready for that.



My son is a 4th grader now, and somehow I came to change my mind. Came to feel like I could welcome an always-loyal and trusting dog to my life. Felt confident I could make good choices for it's health. We thought about another breed for a little while, even pug-sat a weekend for some acquaintances and I nearly changed my mind back to the negative! Pugs are not the dogs for us. I found a spoo breeder in my home state and put a deposit on a puppy. Sadly, that puppy, and much of his litter, were born ill and didn't survive. Crushed before we'd even gotten a dog, we decided to stick it out and wait for another litter. The breeder felt terrible, and helped connect us to another pup in need of a home. He was 10 weeks old, ready right now and a 4 hour drive.



Wrex came home to us over Labor Day weekend this year. He's now 5 months old. My first puppy to teach and train. My first grown up pet for whom I'm financially responsible. The first month was hard. I was angry at this innocent dog for no reason. He wasn't Barney. That's what it was. Even 9 years later, I felt expectations. Wrex looks nothing like him and he certainly doesn't behave like him. Wrex is his own...person, so to speak...and I was expecting him to live up to the memory of my first canine love. Not fair to him. Unhealthy of me. Waiting a long time was the right thing for me and my husband. I know he struggles with the "not Barney" feelings too. We are getting used to each other. Taking him to play with other dogs and seeing just how wonderfully behaved his is by comparison has helped. Do I love him to pieces yet? No, I have to admit. I'm slow to warm. But he amuses me these days. I don't resent him like I did in the beginning. I know we will become good friends who enjoy each other in time.



I wish for you nothing but a peaceful heart. I hope you continue to find comfort here on the poodle boards.

So sorry, I think I felt the same way with the dog I fostered, I wanted to adopt her, but she just was not my dog. Now, Willow is MINE! I hope Wrex becomes yours.
 

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NAME: Evelyn Cummings
LOCATION: NH
EMAIL: [email protected]
URL:Look her up on google.
I got her name from an old friend of mine who trains horses.She was bragging on her Mini poodle, and I asked her where she got her dog. This is the name she gave me. I do not know her, but if Barbara likes her dog I would go look at the breeder she got it from. I am teetering on the edge of looking for another one and may call her myself. When I was looking for my current dog I had a hard time finding one I liked around VT No one had any, or knew anyone who had minis. I do not know where in VT you live, nor do I need to but Claremont is a little south of White River Junction on the other side of the river. I wound up getting mine from Wisc. by way of Ohio, and I was able to have him flown here. I do not think you can do this now, think you have to pick puppies up now, due to new USDA regs.

Also go to VT poodle rescue and look at SNOWBALL.
 

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I am so sorry for your loss of Pella. Reading your post was so heartbreaking it brings back good memories of my Shayna. I had her for 18 Years. She was so special! When she did pass, I was so lost. I am not married, no kids, so the house was very quiet. I thought, what do I do now. I was an emotional wreck. I started checking with many breeders & then found this wonderful site. The most caring people gave me the best advice "you will know when the time is right for another dog". Lo and behold, 6 months later one breeder had 2 toy girls & that was 4 years ago now! Pella was so special to you - her soul will be with you forever. You will know....
Sylvia & the girls :)
 
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Dear Pella, dear friends

I didn't dare to read this thread until now. It's a month today that my dear dog Hecuba died at age almost 16.

Pella, I so agree with ApricotsRock and with shpeckie. You will know, just know, when it is time -- just keep open to it.

Here is a story of how that worked for me: my first dog, Lola, died when she was just about 16. I was living overseas, and she had been ill, and where I lived the level of veterinary care was very basic. All of a sudden the house was quiet and creepy...I live alone, and some noises that I'd thought were dog noises were still there; and it was terribly empty. I couldn't bear the thought of getting another dog, and I couldn't bear not having a dog.

One day a couple of months later when going to a meeting I saw some street puppies. I asked if I could have one, and the people who were taking care of them said I should take two. So I did. The best decision I could have made. The first weekend I spent washing, de-licing and de-ticking those two; they were so delighted afterward, you could see them sitting up straighter and wallowing in their skins. They gained weight on the food I gave them very rapidly and turned into lovely dogs...I could not bring them back to the States with me; they were sight hounds, couldn't tolerate temperatures even in the 60s; and hated being indoors. I rehomed them when I left.

Later that same year the vet asked if I wanted a mini poodle as a friend of hers had bred her dog to another expatriate poodle...and so that's how Jupiter came into the family. He is still with me.

I am a firm believer in overlapping dogs. Having Jupiter and Pericles with me helped enormously with Hecuba's passing. Pericles is a spoo puppy and full of energy and antics and quite demanding of time in a way that older dogs are not. This has been a good thing.

Thank you Pella for sharing your story, and thank you to all who have commented and shared theirs. It is very healing to read them.
 

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I see Evelyn Cummings co owns with Nanci Cote. While I did not meet her in person as I have explained my "poodle magic" I did exchange conversations and emails with Nanci and would definitely visit her if we decided to get another poodle. Jherico Poodles, in NH.
 

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It's just so special that everyone has such a story to their poodle, and they all involve love. I came to this forum because I just needed to at least try and talk to people within the community about my thoughts on my late standard.

I lost my standard poodle to liver disease yesterday. My poor baby was 7.5. It's tough to handle because we know that poodles are generally long living. I thought he was going to see my kids who we are planning to have soon, and it has made the grieving process difficult. I was wondering if anyone else had a similar experience. It could have been a few different things, and he didn't show severe distress signs until very late. Please be kind in your responses. Thank you so much.
 

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wgirard,
You have inadvertently landed on an old, old post. I would suggest reposting in poodle talk so that more forum members can see your post and provide valuable support.

I am so sorry for the loss of your poodle. I do not have any experience in liver disease with dogs, so I do not have anything to share regarding that. I do know the sadness of losing a dog you love, a dog who has faithfully given loyalty, companionship and cuddles for many years- it breaks our hearts when they leave us.

Newport
 
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