Poodle Forum banner

1 - 18 of 18 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
236 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
When i was growing up, if a ball or other toy went into somebody’s yard, you either wrote if off, got yelled at by the neighbor, or snuck in the yard, if there was no fence or dog, to get it. My parents never would have let me go banging relentlessly on somebody’s door.
Our last beighbors’ kids used to come to the door multiple times per day and just knock and knock if a toy went over my frnce and into my yard. At first, I retrieved and returned them but after a while, Icthink the parents should have has the courtesy to tell the kids not to do it anymore. Or, at least, to tell them not to come back more than once.
We have new neighbors and it’s starting all over again. I was in bed with a migraine and the little brats wouldn’t go away! Do parents themselves have any concept of courtesy or decorum today, because they’re definitely not teaching their kids?
When i get a dog, I’m putting up a sign, “anything that comes over the fence becomes property of the dog.”
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
5,614 Posts
why wait till you get the dog? just put up a sign saying anything that comes over the fence will be saved for a future dog.

and yes, nobody is courteous anymore. at eight at night i can hear my neighbors' kid bouncing what must be a basketball in the courtyard. annoying, since my living room faces the courtyard. i put up with it, but if my mother were still alive, i wouldn't. she had serious health issues and didn't need the annoyance.

hope things get better for you.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8,202 Posts
My dogs had a huge collection of soccer balls, baseballs, bouncy balls, tennis balls, and a basketball or two from the neighbor kids next to us and behind us. Like many children today, they had no social skills to come to the door to retrieve them.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
236 Posts
Discussion Starter #5
I’m not old enough to be a cantankerous old person but I don’t want to be chasing kids toys around all summer. If i had kids, I’d tell them they could knock-a couple of times not a thousand- and nobody answered, come home, and I would mever allow them to bother people on a Saturday or Sunday morning. My ild neighbors not only allowed their dogs to ALWAYS be off leash but they never taught their kids manners either. The thingd those kids used to do! Hopefully, these people won’t be as bad but if they are, it’s not like we’re going to be best friends. I’ll just have to tell them I’m not going to put up with it. I wish I lived ion a few acres, with no annoying neoghbors.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
9,476 Posts
I wouldn’t want to be that wicked witch neighbor either, especially since I believe kids need to be outside more, throwing and kicking balls, instead of playing computer games. Doesn’t anyone remember being a kid and your only ball sailed over a neighbor fence? It seemed like such bravery to ask for it back. We rang once, but I never had a ball as expensive as some of my son’s soccer balls. I would just put out them in the front yard, as you happen to find them and let the bell ringers know that’s how it works.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12,104 Posts
If the knocking upsets you, why not tell them that as long as they are careful they may go and retrieve the ball without knocking? Unless, of course, your garden is extremely secure, in which case place something against the fence to facilitate climbing. Working up the courage to retrieve a ball from the ferocious neighbour's garden is a rite of childhood, but being ferocious takes far more time and energy than just letting them get on with it!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,294 Posts
I have a little different take on it I guess. I moved a year ago into a neighborhood with 99% retired people so I don't have kids except one family down the road who has 8. lol. But anyhow, in my last neighborhood there were kids, two next door who were constantly losing their ball over the fence. I thought they were very polite to come ask me if it would be okay to go in my yard to get their ball rather than just tromp through my flower beds to get it. They were courteous and pleasant, apologetic and just nice kids who by accident made their ball go over the fence. These were very small yards and probably not the best for playing certain ball games. It was indeed annoying when I might be taking a rest to have the doorbell ring or a hear a knock, have the dogs go ape shii like they do when someone comes to the door. But I just felt like it was a necessary evil. lol. It did get a bit exasperating when it was repeated more than once in a day... or if the ball went in the backyard, they'd ask if I could get it. Finally, that really got on my nerves to have to play Labrador retriever for them and I'd tell them next time I'm out there gardening I'd toss it over the fence. And I told them if it goes in the front yard not to knock, but to go ahead and go through the little gate (short picket fence) and get it but to be careful not to step on my flowers. Finally, they bought some acreage and moved away and then I moved away and all is well.

It never occurred to me that they were being rude because they were polite about it. And they were pretty cute kids who had trouble playing without losing their balls. They didn't know. I often heard their parents teaching them good manners and behavior in a nice way...explaining things, not yelling at them. I thought they were pretty good parents. And pretty nice kids and that this was just something that happens. I'm happy though, that my senior neighbors aren't doing anything objectionable at all. :amen:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
343 Posts
I approach it differently. The kids next door to me play soccer and other games in their back yard. Since we live on a hill and their yard is higher then mine, balls end up in my yard. I don’t want them going in my dogs fenced in area and I have heard their mother tell them not to go in our yard. I wouldn’t mind their knocking on the door once or twice in a day. They have figured out that if I’m out in the yard I toss any found balls back into their yard so they wait at the fence or last year I placed a bucket between our yards and I would place the found balls (many different sizes) in there for them to retrieve. I love that they play outside. My last neighborhood you never hear the sounds of happy kids playing.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,294 Posts
I agree with you Murphys. You had a good system. I also like to hear happy sounds from children playing outside in a healthy way. After watching an old bf of my daughter's raise his 12 year old, I was horrified at how he allowed that kid to do NOTHING but play video games. That kid didn't do any exercise, refused or complained when asked to join in for a walk or some outing...didn't socialize much with other kids and over ate. He did not relate well with others and in fact, had some kind of aggression problem with another kid that was pretty scary. That drove my daughter and me crazy...such poor parenting. (or lack of) So, if the kids are polite but a little annoying and not really doing anything wrong, playing in the fresh air, I'm pretty happy because it means our next generation who will be our citizens in charge of things...will at least have some sociable, healthy grown ups that learn how to deal with others in a nice way and know how to do other things besides play video games. lol. And I like the sounds of happy children playing. I guess I like kids over all. (unless they're brats)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
182 Posts
With me it depended on the neighbor.

One neighbor taught their children how to be polite and responsible. Kids will be kids and things happen. When a child knocks on my door and owns up to something they did to my property and ask how they can make it right, of course I'm going to work with that child and everyone is happy and the child walks away feeling better about themselves. Matter of fact, those children next to grew up at my place because I was the indulgent grandmotherly type and had all the fun stuff, I put up a basketball hoop, let them fish in my pond and hang out in my backroom playing video games, had the room for horseshoe pits, badmitten nets, ball games, flowers to pick for Mom, and at the time, tons of barnyard animals to fuss over. And now they are bringing their children over to experience a piece of their childhood.

On the other hand, another neighbor had the attitude that they could do anything they want even if it intrudes on a neighbor and passed this on to their kids. I hate to be the cranky old lady, but I had to with those children. They intruded on my property without my permission (used my hayloft as a club house to sneaks smokes, big time fire hazard), I caught them throwing stones at my goats to get to the barn to smoke, they randomly fired off guns in any direction, fell trees over my pasture fence, and allowed two untrained and nasty rotts run rampant and menace me on my property (Rotts are the only breed I now hate because of them). As much as I love children, I just couldn't tolerate this. I am so glad they are now grown and gone. I just hope they have neighbor kids as bad as they were.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
5,614 Posts
hey mish, everyone has gone off on a tangent and done their own thing, forgetting that you have migraines and that makes it very difficult to be miss perky at all times. i don't have a solution for you. you know your neighbors best and whether they are the kind of people with whom you can speak reasonably. we're in a world now where looking at someone cross-eyed can bring on a battle. just wishing for the best resolution to this for you. feel better.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,294 Posts
If I had migraines (I'm so sorry for you and other people who do. My niece has terrible, debilitating ones. It must be horrible) I may still not think that it is rude of the kids to come ask if they can enter my property. They probably don't know that they're bothering you. BUT...I would ask that they stop ringing the bell and ask their parents to instruct them, explaining that it is bothersome to you, especially when you're having one of those episodes. And I would tell them that I'd put the ball over the fence when I can get to it and in the meantime, they'll just have to do without. Or...if I didn't mind, I'd tell them to just come get it if it's not where my dogs would be...like in my back yard but no need to knock or ring the bell. I still think it's more polite for kids to ask permission than to just barge into my yard looking for their ball, trampling my gardens. If I were a little kid and lost my favorite soccer ball because my yard was too small, I'd be very sad not to get it back. It's an accident. I don't see it as rude unless they're rude when they go about asking or if they've been asked to not do something, they continue.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8,202 Posts
I think that is perfect advice, Pb. I also wouldn't want children coming into my yard because it wouldn't be safe. (plus, we have 8' fencing all around, so they couldn't get in LOL!).
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,294 Posts
Nice...an 8' fence would probably keep most balls out unless they hit a homer. LOL.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
236 Posts
Discussion Starter #18
Because of some strange incidents we’ve had, we keep the fence locked. I would not want kids trying to get into the backyard without permission. It is better that they ask but I also don’t want them standing at the door knocking for 5 minites either. I also don’t want them coming to the door multiple times oer day because I work from home
If I see a ball in the yard, then I’ll throe it back. I don’t want to have to be the ballgirl for the neighbors’ kids, though.
I think my last neighbors were so rotten that I’m predisposed to being annoyed. I think if the parents were a little nicer too,’I would have less of an issue with th kids but nobody around here is very friendly.
 
1 - 18 of 18 Posts
Top