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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey everyone!
I absolutely adore poodles and through all my research, as well as working with dogs of all breeds, I've come to the conclussion that a standard would be perfect for my family.
The problem is they can't get over the 'stigma' of them.
My mother has said she'd even be too embarrassed to tell anyone she owned a poodle.
I've tried to talk to her about this and show her that having a poodle is nothing to be ashamed of and that they are amazing dogs.
She much prefers 'Doodles', which I am strongly against. Why get a doodle when you can get a poodle?
She prefers their 'look', but even after showing her pictures of poodles with less 'poodle' cuts, she still seems to be standing firm.

I'm struggling to get through to her and I'm wondering if any of you have any tips or ideas on how to break this mold?
 

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Luca red tpoo and Matteo blue Spoo
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Apparently, the more percent poodle, the better the doodle. I often meet owners who proudly tell me, their dog is 87 1/2 % poodle.
You can trim a poodle in ant way. Look at Japanese Teddy cuts.
I am certainly biased and would go for a poodle any day. Strong, athletic hunting dogs with a sense of humour and a wicked intelligence. What's not to like.
I generally love dogs and fell every breed has its merits, that unfortunately doesn't always shine in mixes. It's not a given, that the best traits from both breeds show. It could be the worst and then you've got double up.
Good luck and follow your heart. Most get over their stigma once they get to know the dog.
 

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If you live independently, it's your decision. But if you're reliant on your mother and/or others, perhaps look into another breed for now. Best to avoid Poodle mixes altogether, imho. There are many, many wonderful breeds and while one can love Poodles, one can also love other breeds as well. I do 🥰.

Or, go with a mix from a rescue who seems wonderful.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
If you live independently, it's your decision. But if you're reliant on your mother and/or others, perhaps look into another breed for now. Best to avoid Poodle mixes altogether, imho. There are many, many wonderful breeds and while one can love Poodles, one can also love other breeds as well. I do 🥰.

Or, go with a mix from a rescue who seems wonderful.
I am in my mid-twenties and live with my mom and early twenties sister.
Sadly we need a more hypoallergenic breed, but I have definitely been keeping an eye on rescues in the area. I would love to rescue but it's super rare they get any breed that is good with allergies, and we have to make sure they'll get along with our other pets!
 

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Show some videos of working poodles!
This video is a guy hunting ducks with his poodle shows some dead ducks so don't watch if sensitive to that

Service dog poodle
Another service dog this one at a school- this one really LOOKS like a doodle so that's cool
Schutzhund poodle
Just some fun examples of poodles doing thing that are outside of what people think of a prissy poodle doing
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Awww I'm sorry to hear that.

What about Portuguese water dog? I mean I'm all for continuing to try for a poodle but thinking of other back up breeds won't hurt.
Yeah definitely! I've had bad experiences working with portuguese water dogs so I'm not sure I'd want to own one. We've been looking a little at spanish water dogs but I still think a poodle would be great for us!
 

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Apparently, the more percent poodle, the better the doodle. I often meet owners who proudly tell me, their dog is 87 1/2 % poodle.
You can trim a poodle in ant way. Look at Japanese Teddy cuts.
I am certainly biased and would go for a poodle any day. Strong, athletic hunting dogs with a sense of humour and a wicked intelligence. What's not to like.
I generally love dogs and fell every breed has its merits, that unfortunately doesn't always shine in mixes. It's not a given, that the best traits from both breeds show. It could be the worst and then you've got double up.
Good luck and follow your heart. Most get over their stigma once they get to know the dog.
Wow, I learned something. I live in Japan, but I never realized the Teddy Bear cut was a Japan-only thing. Our toy has a minor underbite, and we were advised a Teddy cut would disguise this, but we are resisting! He's fabulous no matter what. To the OP, I come from an anti-poodle family, but I started reading about them after developing some pretty severe allergies and realized it's a great breed. Actually, I don't think I ever had doubts about a standard, as they are so dignified and elegant, but standards are too big for our Japanese apartment. I looked for a miniature twelve years ago, but they are almost nonexistent in Japan for some reason, so we ended up getting a Polish Lowland Sheepdog, also hypoallergenic, and she was a terrific family member until she passed away at the end of 2020. Twelve years later, I updated my research and poodles were once again the obvious answer. So we found Charlie, and he has proven to be a wonderful dog in so many ways - smart, athletic, funny, loyal to his family, great with other dogs, etc., etc. We have a lot of doodles in our neighborhood as well, and some of them are lovely, but Charlie got jumped by one and I'd never consider it.
 

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Barbets are the best non-poodle option for a similar temperament. If she is really firm I'd opt for a barbet.

But you would never imagine the actual responses people have to poodles. I keep my poodle in all sorts of cuts from minimal to masculine to feminine. I constantly have very macho type men gushing over how much they love him. Women do too, but probably more men on average! My current boyfriend is very masculine presenting and he met Misha when I had him in a complete shave down. At first he was like please don't let him grow a fluffy head they look silly. But I sloooowly let him grow it back out and boyfriend is totally fine with it and always says how great he looks. And he is now excited I'm letting the tail grow out to a pompon again. He often walks Misha when I'm busy too. I'm not a super feminine person and I was a little unsure about responses I'd get with a poodle, especially in very poodley cuts. But mostly people just adore him. People love a beautiful dog that is well trained.

You could meet some poodles locally, especially ones in less poodley cuts. You could show her videos of poodles duck hunting like they were originally bred for in Germany.

You could also explain to her the difference in coat maintenance for a doodle and a poodle. Many doodles have shedding coats that mat like crazy. They must be brushed at least once a day to prevent matting if you don't want to keep their coat very short. Poodles are also high maintenance but don't mat near as easily. You can get away with a less intensive brushing schedule. Many groomers no longer accept doodles or require them to be on strict 4 week schedules because their coats are so difficult. There are sooo many videos online of horribly matted doodles getting shaved down if you need examples.
 

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Orrrrr
Convince her that "German Water Retriever" is a new type of dog, like a sub group of poodles, but DEFINITELY NOT poodles (even tho they look EXACTLY the same) and somehow convince a "German water retriever" breeder to call them that in front of your mom.

Background info on the new type of dog: German water retrievers, as as opposed to prissy poodles, can only be kept in two cuts: short or doodle-like. As soon as you put them into anything resembling a pom pom cut they magically become a poodle. The good news is the can revert to their water retrieverness after you cut their hair again.
 

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I’m with Basil’s dad- moms usually win, lol. My 13 yo son desperately wants a Border Terrier. I looked a the breed briefly, I’m not into terrier characteristics no matter how cute they are. So we have a Standard Poodle. I know you are an adult, but….Mom’s. 🤣🤣🤣

on a serious note though, the comments about doodles not being 100% hypoallergenic plus having different coat characteristics that may take as much grooming as a poodle, very true. Lots of doodle breeders here in Michigan but I’m also not sure they are being health tested? So a lot of variation in the quality of the dog. Maybe a poodle / doodle rescue organization in your area might have a lovely adult your family will fall in love with! Good luck!
 

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Thomas the Old Man, Ethel May, Jeffrey Steven
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Regarding doodles:
Several years ago a friend of mine bought a doodle from a backyard breeder. She was told the dog was half lab/half poodle and would by hypoallergenic. My friend's husband was all for getting a hunting companion and thought it was awesome that the lab was over 100 pounds and the poodle was 60 pounds. Shortly after bringing the dog home my friend discovered that the dog was not, in fact, hypoallergenic at all. She was also growing incredibly fast and soon became a 45 pound 4 month old puppy. My friend got overwhelmed and I ended up adopting the dog who I named Jane. Came to find out that Jane was the sweetest dog with the shaggiest and most shedding coat imaginable. She was also poorly bred and suffered from recurring UTIs, ear infections, and other health issues because SHOCKER the backyard breeder didn't care about health testing or even understand the breeding that goes into making a "doodle coat'. Poor Jane died at 5 years old after another infection turned systemic. She was also 110 pounds. I loved that dog and think about her a lot. So. Yeah. Watch out for doodles.

I keep my standards in short cuts with minimal floof because it's easier on me. When we go out people ask what kind of dog they are. My aunt watched the three of them run, jump, and play in the backyard. She asked me if I was sure they were poodles because they definitely didn't seem like what she thought poodles were. My dogs are favorites at daycare because they keep the other dogs entertained and have the best temperaments. My trainer loves working with them because they are smart and take maybe 1-2 tries before they pick up on a cue. In short, TEAM POODLE FOR LIFE. Thank you for reading my essay. :ROFLMAO:
 

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At first he was like please don't let him grow a fluffy head they look silly.
My husband was the same way! But he insisted I not, under any circumstances, put poodle boots (bracelets, poms) on Daisy. Of course I let them grow in slowly and now, he won't let me shave them off! Same thing with Daisy's pink tail :)
And the compliments! People stopping their cars to gush about my SPOO - I love it!
 

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Unfortunately you can't always reason with people. When those "people" are your parents, it's especially hard. You'll always be their child so even if you're 100% correct and have the research to back it up they're just hardwired to think they're the parent, they're the adult, it's their call, etc etc.

You're also dealing with matter of opinion, here - her liking this dog over that dog. While i disagree with the unethical breeding of "doodles" and i would never SUPPORT the breeding/sale of them, a part of me is also against strong-arming someone away from their own personal opinions. You're allowed to like or dislike whatever you want and no one has the "right" to forcefully change those opinions. If mom doesn't like poodles, it isn't fair to try to FORCE her to change her mind about them. She has to do that on her own, if she wants to, once presented with facts.

And some people just don't like Poodles - which is perfectly fine. There are breeds that I don't like, myself. No one is going to change my mind on them, either. I'm very stubborn. All you can do is show her that the stereotypes aren't true, that Poodles can make wonderful companions, and so on and so forth and let her come to her own conclusions. Sometimes being too pushy provides the opposite effect of what you want, too.

I think the main problem is the "doodle" part of the equation, here. So, mom doesn't like Poodles and that's fine.... but she likes "doodles". Why? What draws her to the "doodle"? If you can figure that out, maybe you can find a totally DIFFERENT breed that everyone can agree on. Or, you can take her reasonings and try to explain to her why "doodle" may not actually fit them. Like the whole "they don't shed and are hypoallergenic" thing - not true in the slightest. Dealing with two different traits, each with a 50/50 shot of being inherited by anything crossed half Poodle half whatever.

Outline to her your concerns about supporting unethical breeding, and how unethical breeders often skip important health testing and breed for looks and not temperament or health. Maybe if faced with the potential to be paying thousands of dollars for medical care if the dog inherits something bad she'll be more likely to re-consider at least the "doodle" thing. If she's still dead set, then maybe try to steer her towards a rescue. I can support rescuing a "doodle" no problem and you wouldn't be supporting unethical breeding.

In the end, if she's the one paying for this dog, then she's the one with final call. At that point, i would personally step back and tell her: "Look, you want a "doodle" despite everything i've tried to tell you.... okay. But i won't be a part of it. And by that i mean i won't help you care for this dog beyond making sure it stays alive and well, because i can't support neglect either. But i don't feel comfortable supporting unethical breeding and i can't risk becoming attached to a dog that may have serious health or behavioral problems. Sorry, but this is your dog and your call."

I used to have the same idea about Poodles. Prissy frou-frou dogs that do nothing but look silly. I think the show cuts were what got me. Then i became a groomer and actually worked with them. My mentors both had standards, and working with those dogs was what changed my mind about them. Yes they were graceful and elegant and have the potential to look very pretty and very silly... but they were also silly, clumsy, dorky clowns that just wanted to have fun. They're versatile, smart, highly trainable, and fun. Now i have two of them. I had to wait 5 or 6 years to get my first but it was worth it.

It's a pity more people don't like them, but again - everyone is allowed their own opinion (even if it's fueled by misinformation and stereotype.)
 

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Dog Vertebrate Dog breed Mammal Carnivore


Just wanted to add - one of the benefits of a poodle is they don't have to LOOK like one. I had Dublin in an "airedale" like pattern for a long time. There are also very minimalist clips - most of the poodles i groom are done short all over, no fluff or poof. Some of them are even working dogs - they retrieve game for hunters, like they were bred to do.
 
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