I need some advice and you guys are good at it so thought I'd seek your opinions 
I'm considering getting another puppy. Not right now, but preferably in early December so I'll have a month off school to dedicate to housetraining. And hopefully the wounds from Charlie won't hurt as badly by then. But if I decide to go with another poodle I need to start searching now bc I am researching EVERYTHING this time around.
I have some reservations about this. First is after the heartbreaking experience with Charlie, I don't know if I can handle another toy poodle. And after reading so much about puppy mills I kind of want to adopt, but I know the chances of me finding a toy poodle at a shelter are rather slim. But that brings me back to my first problem bc I don't know if I'm equipped to handle a toy poodle.
I know I want a small puppy, as tiny as I can find, and I want to have it from early on. I don't want to adopt a 5 month old puppy, I know that's selfish of me but I want to be part of his/her ENTIRE life. I know I would love it the same and so on, but I don't know..it's just what I want. And size is important to me. It's kind of hard to tell what kind of size or pet you're going to get when you're adopting and the puppy is different breeds.
When I bought Charlie I knew absolutely nothing about toy poodles. Or dogs in general. I researched after the fact and learned a very painful lesson along the way. While I KNOW I did everything I could to save Charlie and she did not die from hypoglycemia as much as those bastards keep blaming me for that..it has kind of traumatized me. I feel like a failure and I do know I didn't kill Charlie and it wasn't my fault that she wouldn't eat and I had to force feed her...I'm scared that I could get a toy poodle and it would run too much or not eat enough and get hypoglycemia. I think it's something that I would constantly agonize over and be super paranoid about so I don't know if I should get a toy poodle..but the hypoglycemia factor goes for any small dog and that's what I want. I've been spending a bit of time with my friends dogs and while the big dogs are great, I know I want something small that I can carry around. Which by the way my best friend got charms for both of her dogs collars - it's a pink heart that says "In Memory of Charlie" ugh it broke my heart, but thought it was so cute and thoughtful of her.
What first appealed to me about poodles is that toy poodles are tiny - that's the only reason I got Charlie. Now I know that they're super smart and don't shed and I want a dog that has those qualities as well. I know I will never be able to replace Charlie and it's not what I'm trying to do, I just think I am capable of giving an animal a very loving home and I so badly want to experience the joys of having a pet as all I got with Charlie was heartbreak. Don't get me wrong, I loved her with my whole heart - but it has really messed me up. I still randomly burst into tears over it. I know I couldn't get one that's the same color as Charlie bc it would hurt too much. I kind of want a red one, but I've read they're hard to find. I want a red one to name Lucy (after Lucille Ball) and I'm just so in love with the idea of being able to say "Lucy, I'm home!" ha silly I know, but I'm weird like that. So if anyone knows of anyone that breeds red toy poodles in AZ please let me know as I'm making decisions about this.
I guess my question is getting a puppy from a breeder vs. adopting and whether I should even try getting another toy poodle. For those of you with toy poodles, is hypoglycemia something that they experience a lot? Charlie was sent sick, I know this, but I can't help but feel like I failed her and I can't go through that kind of heartbreak again. I really don't know what to do.
I'm considering getting another puppy. Not right now, but preferably in early December so I'll have a month off school to dedicate to housetraining. And hopefully the wounds from Charlie won't hurt as badly by then. But if I decide to go with another poodle I need to start searching now bc I am researching EVERYTHING this time around.
I have some reservations about this. First is after the heartbreaking experience with Charlie, I don't know if I can handle another toy poodle. And after reading so much about puppy mills I kind of want to adopt, but I know the chances of me finding a toy poodle at a shelter are rather slim. But that brings me back to my first problem bc I don't know if I'm equipped to handle a toy poodle.
I know I want a small puppy, as tiny as I can find, and I want to have it from early on. I don't want to adopt a 5 month old puppy, I know that's selfish of me but I want to be part of his/her ENTIRE life. I know I would love it the same and so on, but I don't know..it's just what I want. And size is important to me. It's kind of hard to tell what kind of size or pet you're going to get when you're adopting and the puppy is different breeds.
When I bought Charlie I knew absolutely nothing about toy poodles. Or dogs in general. I researched after the fact and learned a very painful lesson along the way. While I KNOW I did everything I could to save Charlie and she did not die from hypoglycemia as much as those bastards keep blaming me for that..it has kind of traumatized me. I feel like a failure and I do know I didn't kill Charlie and it wasn't my fault that she wouldn't eat and I had to force feed her...I'm scared that I could get a toy poodle and it would run too much or not eat enough and get hypoglycemia. I think it's something that I would constantly agonize over and be super paranoid about so I don't know if I should get a toy poodle..but the hypoglycemia factor goes for any small dog and that's what I want. I've been spending a bit of time with my friends dogs and while the big dogs are great, I know I want something small that I can carry around. Which by the way my best friend got charms for both of her dogs collars - it's a pink heart that says "In Memory of Charlie" ugh it broke my heart, but thought it was so cute and thoughtful of her.
What first appealed to me about poodles is that toy poodles are tiny - that's the only reason I got Charlie. Now I know that they're super smart and don't shed and I want a dog that has those qualities as well. I know I will never be able to replace Charlie and it's not what I'm trying to do, I just think I am capable of giving an animal a very loving home and I so badly want to experience the joys of having a pet as all I got with Charlie was heartbreak. Don't get me wrong, I loved her with my whole heart - but it has really messed me up. I still randomly burst into tears over it. I know I couldn't get one that's the same color as Charlie bc it would hurt too much. I kind of want a red one, but I've read they're hard to find. I want a red one to name Lucy (after Lucille Ball) and I'm just so in love with the idea of being able to say "Lucy, I'm home!" ha silly I know, but I'm weird like that. So if anyone knows of anyone that breeds red toy poodles in AZ please let me know as I'm making decisions about this.
I guess my question is getting a puppy from a breeder vs. adopting and whether I should even try getting another toy poodle. For those of you with toy poodles, is hypoglycemia something that they experience a lot? Charlie was sent sick, I know this, but I can't help but feel like I failed her and I can't go through that kind of heartbreak again. I really don't know what to do.