[rmillstein]

This suggestion may not work, and I'm sure some might say it's the wrong thing to do, but I would try putting the dog's bed next to your bed.

The reason I suggest this has to do with my own experience with my miniature poodle (who is also named Marley!). My Marley is also a rescue -- although he didn't quite go through the trauma that yours did, still, this is his third home. The first night we got him home was a bit rocky; we told him to go to his bed and he went out and stood in the hallway! (That broke my heart). We eventually got him settled down next to our bed, though, and we went to sleep. I had to go to work the next day, and then meet some people at a cafe afterwards. My partner joined us at the cafe with Marley in tow. There was a whole group of people there, but Marley immediately came up to me, even though he hardly knew me. And the only thing I can think of is that by having us all sleep together in the same room, he knew that we were a "pack." We had a house guest later that week, but although Marley liked her, he didn't attach himself to her the way he did to us.

So, maybe this is all hogwash, but it's worth a try, anyway, I'd say.

But be patient. We were told that it takes 6 mos for an adult dog to adjust fully to a new home, and that was about right -- but we've noticed adjustments even since then. It does take time, but it is ever so worth it. Hang in there.

 

[rmillstein]

Thank you all for your great advice!! I actually haven't even had to use my Bach's yet. The night I went to purchase the Bach's from a local pet store I got some GREAT advice from the owners. In just three days Marley is now wagging his tale when I walk in the front door...licking my hand...playing with his toys and acting so full of life! I actually got a kiss on the face today!!! He's even sit in my lap for a few minutes!

So thank you for your advice!

That's great news!!! So, what was the advice that the pet store owners gave?

 

[rmillstein]

Now that is interesting. Our trainer tells us not to look away from Carlo. he says a "stare-down" contest with him means he is challenging us.. If we look way that means he wins and he is top dog.
anyone else have thoughts on this?
but I definitely can see a big difference between Calo and sergio. Sergio keeps his eyes down and his head a little tilted down. Carlo's head and tail are always up, straight and tall just as though he is ready to take the ring. (he is not a show dog, but comes from two champion parents). Sergio never has stare downs with us and is the most obedient and loving dog. Carlo is very standoffish and aggressive.
i'd really like to hear what others think.

Our trainer told us the same thing. But it may be that whereas staring down a dominant dog shows that you are dominant, staring down a more passive dog just scares the you-know-what out of the dog. So, I don't know enough about MarleysMom's dog to know if it is dominant or passive, but if the dog is being friendlier now, that is a good sign. On the other hand, I'd be a little worried about the 4 am visits. That's a behavior you definitely want to discourage! I'd give the dog a firm "no," and then try again to get him to sleep in the same room (use "go to your bed" or "good night" or whatever). That nice blanket and toys that the dog likes that are in the living room ... those could be moved to the bedroom at night.

[Our poodle is definitely on the dominant side, but we've got him to the point where he (mostly) listens to us. Even so, though, he gives us a lot of eye contact. Part of that seems to be his obsession with knowing what we are doing or going to be doing at every moment of the day].

 

[rmillstein]

he's a really really great dog! Love him dearly!

Excellent news!! You seem to be "over the hump" with him. Here's to rescued poodles named Marley!

-- the other Marley's Mom