cookieface

I'm posting this here because it's more about me than about my poodle. I love her dearly - she's absolutely wonderful and I can't imagine our lives without her. That said, I've been a nervous wreck since she's joined our family. I think the worst every time she snorts, scratches, or burps.

Is this just me (I'm really starting to think it is)? Do other new dog owners go through a period of nervousness? I know she picks up on my anxiety and I really don't want it to affect our relationship. I just don't know what to do.

Any advice?

Fluffyspoos

Yes, it does get easier. I'm just starting to stop staring at them while they're sleeping, trying to see if they're breathing, and waking them up if they're breathing shallow. Like they'd drop dead in their sleep? Ha, I found out I wasn't the only one that did this though!

.. though I will shove a gas-x down someone's throat if they're acting fishy.. just in case.

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fjm

The quick answer is Yes, it does get easier - as you get to know what is normal for your poodle you worry less, and become more confident about recognising the abnormal. It does sound as if you have rather a large dose of new-owner anxiety, though. Is there anyone locally who could mentor you through these first months? I was very fortunate in having both an excellent vet practice, who have always encouraged social visits with pups and have been endlessly reassuring, and in enrolling my pups for kindergarten training with a local trainer who is also a qualified behaviourist - she too was hugely patient in her responses to my anxious emails!

I have a sort of mental check for the probably minor things, from scratching to vomiting:
Once = blip
Twice = watch carefully for other symptoms
Thrice = investigate probable causes, and take action if necessary

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To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden,
where doing nothing was not boring- it was peace.

~ Milan Kundera

cookieface

Thank you both for your reassurances. It's good to know I'm not the only one who feels like this.

The first few nights I was awake every few minutes listening for movement - too much worried me, not enough worried me. Finally after about 4 nights, I was completely exhausted and finally slept.

Is there a downside to using gas-x if they don't have a problem?

Unfortunately, I don't really have anyone nearby who I can contact for quick questions or general guidance. We are enrolling in a class that starts in a few weeks, so I hope that will help.

I like your mental check - I'll keep it in mind.

Thanks again!

Theo'sMom

One thought that helped me when Theo had bronchitis and a cough was "Theo wants to be healthy. HE wants to get better. He wants to grow up and lead a healthy life." This took some of the pressure off of me.
I first "discovered" this was helpful a few years ago when I was planting vegetables I grew from seeds. When you go from nurturing them indoors to planting outdoors they go through shock. I was so anxious they would die. Then I realized that they have a will to live. I don't have to worry because they want to live and they will do what it takes to survive as long as I do my part. And the seedlings did survive!
So I used the same idea with my anxiety about Theo.
I think this works because it takes some of the control out of my hands and gives it to the other life whether it be plant, dog or person.
So you can try telling yourself that she wants to breath. She wants to be healthy so she can run and play tomorrow. You don't have to put it all on yourself. Even though she is just a puppy, her will is strong. I hope that this is reassuring to you.

tokipoke

I thought I was the only one who stared at my sleeping poodle lol...

Every now and then I'll ask my husband "Hey... is Leroy breathing??" - he doesn't even look at me crazy and looks at Leroy and affirms that he is breathing. Good to know my husband doesn't think I'm TOO crazy...

lilypoo

One word...Xanax!

LOL I'm just kidding. Sort of. I have panic attacks and I needed Xanax to get through Lily's two emergency visits!!!

You can always turn to us here if you're worried!

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*Chelee*

Hayley22

Cookieface, I can completely relate to this! I just got Delphi on Sunday, and the first night she was here I had nightmares all night about her not being able to breathe, or being too cold, etc. I really don't think you're alone in this. This is only the third full day that I've had Delphi, but I'm already starting to see how resilient she is. Yes, she is tiny and she does need to be looked after. But she's not as frail and as fragile as I think. I also think that you can only worry about things that you can control. For instance, I took Delphi for a check up at the vet and he told me I basically need to quarantine her until two weeks after her last vaccination. That's for the next 6 weeks! I've realised that although his advice has some standing, I can only control the things I can control. I'm not prepared to become a complete nervous wreck, and be in isolation, for the next 6 weeks just because there is a chance that someone who touches her might have touched a sickly dog. I can take precautions, for instance, not letting strangers cuddle her, and not taking her to parks and other places where there are lots of dogs, but I can't not go to the shops to buy food, or not go to my mom's place, on the basis that Delphi may get ill. I'm also hoping this will get better in time (my worrying). I keep reminding myself that she is more resilient than she looks!

JE-UK

I love this list.

It does get better, but never really goes away completely.

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"Yes is so much important than No." Dominique Barbier

cookieface

Thanks for all your reassurances and support. It really does help to know I'm not alone and that hundreds (millions?) of poodles have survived novice human caretakers.

I've seriously thought about talking to my doctor about this. Surprisingly, I was much calmer before my dissertation defense when I really thought I'd be paralyzed with nervousness.