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Old 12-30-2012, 02:56 AM   #31 (permalink)
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Interesting post. I had a similar situation before the holidays. Was really upset as friend was playing hard with Harry but unhappy he is still mouthing. Sure it hurts, he has teeth but if you play hard the risk increases.

I offered to put him in his crate or completely ignore him. Well she said she would ignore , but he continued to play and she continued to play. He nipped her and she smacked him in front of me. It was a 'play' tap but in my mind out of line. He is my dog at the end of the day and how I reprimand him is my decision.

I was upset and shocked but really did not know what to do as she was ignoring me already. I texted the next day and said what I felt. I felt better and also I was entitled to say it. She took it but not sure how the friendship will go now....

(Harry is not my child. He is a dog. But like an analogy of a child, every parent has own ideas of parenting. On the whole no one is more right or wrong in their method, but each parent has the right to determine what happens in the child's upbringing)

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Old 12-30-2012, 03:05 AM   #32 (permalink)
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i find sometimes that the non dog friends are often the best to vist round mine because they totally ignore them so they both setle back down in their beds very quickly. the dog loving ones are a nightmare at the moment because they just want to fuss the cute puppy and ignore opie. i now tell guests that they either pay opie attention first or they have to ignore both dogs.
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Old 12-30-2012, 07:28 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by tattoogirl73 View Post
i find sometimes that the non dog friends are often the best to vist round mine because they totally ignore them so they both setle back down in their beds very quickly.
That's true! I just realized I like that too
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Old 12-30-2012, 08:50 AM   #34 (permalink)
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I am a dog person who doesn't currently have a dog, but has 4 cats. Two of my cats are especially naughty when it comes to food on the table, so when we have guests over I will tend to shut them in the bedroom for a while while we eat. They're always given a chance to stay out, but if they come trying to steal, off to the bedroom they go. At the very least, I have a few squirt bottles around in case anyone gets too close. I admit that I've allowed my cats to get spoiled over the years, and we deal with it.

I love dogs and love having them around. But on Christmas day when we went to my husband's aunt's house, I admit I was very frustrated. Auntie set up a cute little table for my son (4), nephew (4), and niece (2), low to the ground. Her two dogs spent the entire time with their noses in the kids' laps, or trying to lick their faces, or take food that was dropped. Sitting at the table, the kids were eye level with the two dogs, who refused to leave them alone. The kids definitely didn't like it. At one point, my MIL asked Auntie if we could shut the dogs in the bedroom just until the kids were done eating, and she replied "Well, you could try, but they won't stay there."

I should also mention that a few months ago, during dinner, Grandma dropped a napkin on the floor and one of the dogs went for it. Grandma went to pick up the napkin and the dog bit her hand! I ended up spending the entire Christmas meal shooing dogs away from the kids, worried that the kids would try to pick something up that had dropped from the floor, only to get bit by an old, half blind dog going for the same item.

So tell me, was my frustration unreasonable?



Absloutely not!

It was bad manners for the dogs to be allowed to sit and bother the kids, especially while they eat. And bite Grams hand??? Enough said. My dog would of learned a quick and hard lesson there on the spot...but by ME. If by chance I wasnt there, I would hope someone would reasonably reprimand the dog right away so it would know biting anyone is unacceptable.
A well behaved dog should also listen and respect boundaries even if they are given by a guest. They should not have free run to behave badly. I think this thread was meant to explore how we felt about people not respecting and verbally abusing our dogs in our home. Just because someone doesnt like dogs, they certainly dont have the right to disrespect the canine member of our family. But, if we invite or allow people to enter our home they deserve a little respect too. Not to be harrassed by uncontrollable dogs jumping all over them, knocking down their kids or biting Gramas hand......
My son has 2 dogs and even though I love them and babysit them in my home for their vacations I hate that they jump all over us when we visit them. Their claws hurt, imagine a kid!
BTW ...they dont jump up on people when they are in my home, they just wag their tails allot more.
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Old 12-30-2012, 11:38 AM   #35 (permalink)
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I have to say, I feel your pain this season. Normally holidays are done at my mother's home or mine. This year we were split between two nursing homes, visiting my Great Aunt and my grandfather. Neither of them are dog people. My aunt is very ugly to me, however the nursing home loves Remington, and we were even allowed to visit the therapy room to help residents to reach farther or encourage them. He was amazing, and loved it. However in visiting with my grandfather he got really nasty and was teasing Remington making noises and then he made this motion that he was hitting Remington. I came unglued. We spent the next couple hours while the family ate sitting in my car. The way I look at it, I was I am entrusted to look after Remington's best interest. I am there to protect him and be his voice. I get angry when they call him "dog"... My mother is one of the worst offenders of doing that. I try to remind her that if it were not for him, I would not be making the hour plus drive to see her....
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Old 12-30-2012, 04:40 PM   #36 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by schnauzerpoodle View Post
No, your frustration was not unreasonable at all. BUT since you were at her house, the (inconsiderate, in this case) hostess had the say. If I were a mother of a four-year-old child in this situation, I would have told my husband's aunt, "The children's table is really cute. You are so sweet setting that up but I want my son to focus while eating. That's kind of an ongoing training in our home. Is it okay if he sits with us?"

I have no right to discipline other people's pets/kids but I can control where my pets/kids go, I guess.
She was insistent that the kids sit at that table and no where else. Thing of it is, the table was placed where she normally keeps the dogs' food and water dishes (which she moved about 4ft away during the meal). So the dogs are used to eating in that space anyway. She was offended when we politely asked her to keep the dogs away, and glared at us when my MIL and I sat nearby to constantly give the dogs the commend to go away. Auntie would call her dogs back, but they'd always return after a moment or so. She'd be distracted, and wouldn't notice until either we said something, or the poor 2yr old would yell "Doggy go away!"

Yes, it is her house, and the dogs live there. But I feel like when you invite people over to your house, you need to recognize the limitations of both your pets and your guests.

For me, I know that at least two of my cats will try to steal food from the table, so I would never host a dinner party without recognizing that, at some point, I'd have to shut the cats in another room. Yes, my cats live here (and normally have the run of every inch of my house). However, I love my family and my friends, and I want them to be comfortable when they visit. If that means keeping the cats shut away during mealtime, then so be it. I also make sure that I keep the cats locked up when we have lots of little kids over. I can't expect the kids to always remember to shut the door, nor can I expect my Athena to resist the temptation to bolt out the door whenever she gets the chance. I understand both their limitations, plan accordingly, and most of the time everyone has a happy visit.
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Old 12-30-2012, 04:54 PM   #37 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by swismiself View Post
She was insistent that the kids sit at that table and no where else. Thing of it is, the table was placed where she normally keeps the dogs' food and water dishes (which she moved about 4ft away during the meal). So the dogs are used to eating in that space anyway. She was offended when we politely asked her to keep the dogs away, and glared at us when my MIL and I sat nearby to constantly give the dogs the commend to go away. Auntie would call her dogs back, but they'd always return after a moment or so. She'd be distracted, and wouldn't notice until either we said something, or the poor 2yr old would yell "Doggy go away!"

Yes, it is her house, and the dogs live there. But I feel like when you invite people over to your house, you need to recognize the limitations of both your pets and your guests.

For me, I know that at least two of my cats will try to steal food from the table, so I would never host a dinner party without recognizing that, at some point, I'd have to shut the cats in another room. Yes, my cats live here (and normally have the run of every inch of my house). However, I love my family and my friends, and I want them to be comfortable when they visit. If that means keeping the cats shut away during mealtime, then so be it. I also make sure that I keep the cats locked up when we have lots of little kids over. I can't expect the kids to always remember to shut the door, nor can I expect my Athena to resist the temptation to bolt out the door whenever she gets the chance. I understand both their limitations, plan accordingly, and most of the time everyone has a happy visit.
Poor you. If I couldn't protect my kid from being disturbed, I would not go there again.
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Old 12-30-2012, 07:05 PM   #38 (permalink)
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Personally I expect my poos to behave themselves. They are like kids to me, and I don't allow them to be spoiled at least to an extent. Also when guest are here I do my best to keep them away from guest that don't want to be disturbed. My Girls aren't allowed on the furniture or in my kitchen without permission. They are not allowed near people while they eat or to jump on people without being asked. Oh and i hate when people want to pay attention to he tpoo and ignore or rebuff the mpoo! Yeah she's bigger and livelier, but they should be treated equally. If my mini is not good enough nor is my toy. I also expect other peoples pets to behave while in my house. That said I would get upset if somebody yelled at my dog since I do stay on them anyway. My house my rules. I was taught as a child that you can't just make yourself at home even if you are told too lol! I would probably kick them out If they did it more than once lol.
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Old 12-31-2012, 03:31 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by sweetheartsrodeo View Post
I have to say, I feel your pain this season. Normally holidays are done at my mother's home or mine. This year we were split between two nursing homes, visiting my Great Aunt and my grandfather. Neither of them are dog people. My aunt is very ugly to me, however the nursing home loves Remington, and we were even allowed to visit the therapy room to help residents to reach farther or encourage them. He was amazing, and loved it. However in visiting with my grandfather he got really nasty and was teasing Remington making noises and then he made this motion that he was hitting Remington. I came unglued. We spent the next couple hours while the family ate sitting in my car. The way I look at it, I was I am entrusted to look after Remington's best interest. I am there to protect him and be his voice. I get angry when they call him "dog"... My mother is one of the worst offenders of doing that. I try to remind her that if it were not for him, I would not be making the hour plus drive to see her....


Its so obvious how much you love Remington. I can see me sitting in the car too.
I was very lucky to have parents who love animals as much as I do and supported that while I was growing up. In contrast, my husbands family, well lets just say, doesnt have the empathy for them that we do. Isnt it nice and reassurring that children dont always take on their parents level of compassion towards animals?
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Old 12-31-2012, 08:19 AM   #40 (permalink)
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I had a ton of people over Christmas Eve.... I know a bunch of you don't like Caeser Milan but I use his "no talk, no touch, no eye contact" rule with guests.... I started it Bc Lola was a piddler but realized its a lot less stressful on the dogs if a bunch strangers aren't messing with them (besides the fact that then ppl can't be messing with their top knots lol) and it was almost as if the dogs naturally adopted the same rule for themselves Bc they both ended up sprawled out on my bed away from the company. There were small children and a few idiots in my house :-/ and I felt better that the pups were chillaxing on my bed .... btw... My bedroom door was wide open so they were choosing to be there.

And had I seen a child or adult teasing one of them I would def have stepped in and stopped that.... ESP a puppy or a nervous dog... I have 7 and 10 year old children and they are EXTREMELY respectful with our two spoos (or else).... and their friends too! Neighborhood kids walk into my house looking up at the ceiling (no eye contact lol) We have them all trained... They know not to mess with the poodles or their koo koo mother ;-)

As far as poop in the yard...well .....I have two 40-50lb dogs... They don't poop in the house... That's pretty much fair warning to watch where u step in the yard ��


We use the no talk, no touch, no eye-contact rule too because of our terrier. Any form of attention towards him is positive, and he can really get over-worked quickly when new people come in. After 15 minutes people can interact with the dogs just fine, but I need calm greetings. We don't have a 'piddler' but I think it's just really frustrating to be a guest in a home where dogs are going nuts and climbing all over people so I like my home to be free of that behavior. Gryphon is really well behaved regardless of what people do, but the terrier really needs that 15 minutes to realize he's not getting anything from anyone until he is calm. If someone talks to him before then, he just starts going crazy.

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