LittleGracie

So my standard, 10 months old can't stand for me to leave. She screams! not barks but screams at the top of her lungs as though she's got a limb trapped somewhere or someone is killing her!

I've tried so many different things including leaving her free reign in a room but that doesn't work either, she chewed a hole in the middle of my wall! ( I have no idea how she got it started but she did! I even thought it was her just scratching through but I found drywall in her poop :( if she's not in her crate she becomes destructive, so I've been using that. I've tried so many other things as well:

- longggg walks before I leave her, to exhaust her.
- long walks with a backpack for an extra workout
- correcting her when she starts screaming (but now she knows not to start until a few minutes after I leave.)
- placing stuffed animals in her crate with her, she likes it but it doesn't stop her from screaming
- giving her a kong with peanut butter in her crate
- other keep busy toys
- putting both my dogs in the crate together
- putting a shirt on her so she feels like "I'm hugging" her and secure
- placing a towel over her crate so she can't see as much
- leaving her with other people while I go to work

nothing is working, it doesn't matter if others are there, or if she's got a new toy to keep her distracted, she still freaks out and no one can calm her down except me.

She also knows the sound of my voice and the sound of my car so when I pull up she'll start the screaming again (if she stopped while I was gone) when she hears my engine. I can correct her when I'm outside the house by telling her no from outside the window but that only lasts for so long.

If anyone has any suggestions, please help! I need any and all suggestions to try!

Thanks so much.

Aussie_Fox

I am led to believe that one of the most important things to look at is how you treat her when she starts screaming...
When you 'correct' her do you pat her? cuddle her?? talk in soothing tones???

when you come home, do you give her your attention as soon as you walk in the door?? are you scolding, soothing?? etc.

it is most important that you start ignoring her when she starts.... dont give her any attention.... to her any attention IS attention.

walk around her... ignore her, put your nose in the air, arm and hands up - out of her way, so she cant nuzzle her nose into your hand for a pat.....

when she STOPS....give her attention - pat her praise her feed her etc..... ONLY reward the behaviour you want.

start with little steps - plan small duration of time of separtion and build up - it might be that she is in the crate and you walk to another room...then outside ... then around the block.... small increases and wait for success at each stage. hope that makes sense.

LittleGracie

Thanks Aussie_Fox for your thoughtful reply,

I don't pat her or cuddle her or try to comfort her when she's screaming because she definitely is an attention hog and I know that reward would be a bad behaviour reinforcer.

As for when I come home, 9 times out of 10 she's settled because she knows what's coming next, that I do a few things before I come to her ie. bathroom, change water, change my clothes, open the backdoor, then open her crate, go into the living room, and then give her the command to exit her crate and she doesn't mind waiting for that. ( I started that routine early with her because she's also an excited pee'er so I don't give her eye contact or greet her at all, I open the back door and then her crate and give her the command to go, that alleviated her "sprinkling" in the house and keeps her calm)

Also, the funny thing is that she is fine in her crate if I'm in the house, there's no anxiety, like when I come in but have to make several trips to the car or I'm doing laundry downstairs she wont scream, it's when I lock the door and leave the house completely, she knows the difference. No problem leaving her in another room while I'm in the same building or for a few minutes after I'm gone, its after that she will scream. It seems as though I'll really have to start at the around the block stage, but how do I use the ignoring and praise strategy if I'm not there?

JE-UK

I have a poodle drama queen too, so feel for you. The scream goes straight through your skull ... we call it The Scream of the Gutted Goat.

It sounds like you are doing all the things I would do to make her happy & comfortable when you leave, but nothing is outweighing the joy of being with her person. It is the dark side of poodle love .

Maybe a session with a behaviourist, who might have some ideas?

Good luck!

LittleGracie

Thanks JE!

I feel better knowing she's not the only shrieker! I've never had a dog who feels the need to do this so I'm stumped. I think you're right, if all else fails I will have to call in a professional. I can't imagine that she enjoys that behaviour, but I could be wrong.... could it be her was of self soothing maybe?

OriginalUsername

My 9 month old spoo is exactly the same! Like you dog, she'll happily sit on her own in another room as long as she knows where I am. If I leave the house though she goes crazy. I've tried leaving treats and fill a kong etc but she doesn't touch them!

When we got her spayed at 6 months, she was supposed to stay for the whole day at the vets to recover but they had to call us to collect her early because she was screaming the place down! I could hear her from the carpark! She instantly relaxed when she saw me and was clearly exhausted from the op, but had still managed to stay awake to howl like that.

Like you, I don't give her any attention when I get home until she calms down. I also try to make sure she's calm when I'm leaving, although she gets excited when she sees me getting my keys, shoes etc.

I really hope it's just because she's young and that she'll grow out of it. I feel horrible having to leave her when I know how distressed she gets. She was with her mother and sister until she was 4 months old (she was being kept as a show dog by the breeder but then decided only to keep her sister) so I wonder if it had something to do with that. How long was your dog with its mother for LittleGracie?

LittleGracie

I'm hoping the same thing... that she'll grow out of it. I'd suggest trying to put a tight shirt on her, sometimes that works with Gracie. I also hate to see her suffer, the look of distress on her face is so sad, she's really not a happy dog living like that. Even with my other dog as company she spins out of control.
Things are much worse when I leave her at my parent's house I guess because she's not as familiar with that setting, I think I'm gonna have to take her to the vet or try some herbal anxiety aids. It's just so sad. (Trust me I don't give off that feeling when I'm leaving her, just when I talk about how distressed she gets).

Gracie was taken from her parents and came straight home with me at 8 weeks so I wouldn't necessarily say that's the cause, I also have another dog who I got at 4 months and he has never had any separation anxiety. Well I can't say that, when I'm not home he doesn't eat or play, just sleeps and waits till I get home but never any issue with him.

LittleGracie

I'm hoping the same thing... that she'll grow out of it. I'd suggest trying to put a tight shirt on her, sometimes that works with Gracie. I also hate to see her suffer, the look of distress on her face is so sad, she's really not a happy dog living like that. Even with my other dog as company she spins out of control.
Things are much worse when I leave her at my parent's house I guess because she's not as familiar with that setting, I think I'm gonna have to take her to the vet or try some herbal anxiety aids. It's just so sad. (Trust me I don't give off that feeling when I'm leaving her, just when I talk about how distressed she gets).

Gracie was taken from her parents and came straight home with me at 8 weeks so I wouldn't necessarily say that's the cause, I also have another dog who I got at 4 months and he has never had any separation anxiety. Well I can't say that, when I'm not home he doesn't eat or play, just sleeps and waits till I get home but never any issue with him.

JE-UK

Not sure if this is helpful or not, but I find my clingy boy is absolutely fine with being left (or at least resigned) if he isn't surprised by it. We try to be clear in signals and let him know as early as possible if he's NOT going with. He curls up in 'his' chair and sulks, but at least doesn't scream. If we forget to 'prep' and leave him unexpectedly, he is much more distressed.

georgiapeach

Here's a link for Thundershirts: Thundershirt | The Best Dog Anxiety Treatment

Here's another link for Rescue Remedy, which has helped some dogs: Natural stress relief for pets - Rescue® Remedy Pet

Good luck with your dog! I have a cockapoo that cries when I leave, but she doesn't scream, thank goodness! It looks like you're doing the right things, behaviorally. As an earlier poster mentioned, you may have to start over with short stays, then lengthening them gradually. That would be tough for me, because I HAVE to go to work.

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Beth, mom to Potsie, 3 year old cream minipoo, and Maddie, 2 year old ???